I Need Help

. . . Of the psychiatric type. As you know we recently booked one vacation. That's when my nerve pain started to surface. I'm trying not to focus on the bike travel logistics or the fact that we really need to whip ourselves into shape. I think we got that under control. I am personally working out three times a day so I should be OK. I'm feeling like I'm getting stronger and nothing makes me happier than that.

So maybe it was time to think about booking another vacation. You know, as a reward for the first vacation. I actually got the feeling that maybe it would be nice to go on a vacation to just have fun and maybe relax a little. Not expend a zillion calories a day, and most importantly, not feel guilty for not burning all the calories. Yes, this sounded like a wonderful plan and Karlo was game.

I must first confess that this whole grand plan was mostly brought on due to the fact that we have a $400 credit with United Airlines (from them royally screwing up our last flying vacation). This credit will expire mid-May and I just hated the thought of wasting it. So OK, I'm sort of busted. I wasn't really motivated by wanting to relax and reward ourselves, but rather I was motivated by not wanting to waste something. Gee, there's a big surprise.

I spent the past week researching different options. With the new hikes in airfares, you can't really go too far on $400 so the likely choice was to fly to Florida and take a cruise. Yes, that sounded perfect. Maybe this was going to be easy.

But then again, maybe it was going to be a colossal ordeal that would put me over the edge and flair my nerve problem up even more. OMG, there are no words for how angry I am at United Airlines right now. That is a really long story that I'm not even going to document because it will just serve to upset me all over again when I read my blog book next year. So we will just fast forward past all the reasons why I HATE United Airlines at this moment. We completely ditched the idea of trying to use their entirely useless credit and completely bagged my original plan to fly to Miami and cruise to Mexico. Instead I found a cruise to Bermuda that would require a much cheaper flight. I thought I had my mind made up.

No, I changed it right before booking. I just couldn't stop brooding over the Bermuda excursions. I got over the whole 'triangle' thing that bugged me, but it was the lame excursions that I just couldn't accept. The 2 best shore excursions that I could dig up involved an 8 mile bike ride and 30 minutes of kayak paddling. I tried to imagine Karlo and I going for an 8 mile group bike ride that would ultimately take 2 hours and I knew we would blow a gasket. There was just no way we could do it and there were no 'adventure' excursions offered. So much for my 'no guilt over not exercising' plan. Simply can't be done.

My next plan was Alaska, but that would require sucking it up and using that stupid United credit. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad. Alaska would be way cooler (OK, make that colder), but the excursions kicked booty - totally our style and we would love them. I was sold and ready to book. I made the announcement to Karlo last night that "we are going to Alaska!" He was thrilled.

Luckily I slept on this idea. The more I thought of going to Alaska in early May the more I thought I was nuts. If we are going to go, I want to do it right - not cheap out just to use the credit. Why not go in July? OMG, I was starting to drive myself nuts and Karlo was ready to commit me to an institution. How many times can I change my mind about one stupid vacation?

And after all that, this afternoon I think I finally made the last decision. I went completely full circle and I'm right back to the EXACT same cruise that I started with - to Mexico only buying our own airline tickets and saying to Hell with United. I still haven't book the trip yet and that means I have plenty of time to change my mind 6 more times. God, please give Karlo the patience he needs to live with me!

Stay tuned to find out where we will end up . . . maybe the Institute of Living the way I'm going.